It’s not a secret that people (with ASD) have sensory issues – with the main one being ‘touch’. Now for me, it’s Light touches… I can’t explain what it is about it that I find so offensive but I just can’t be dealing with light brushing of the arms, etc. Like, if you’re gonna touch me do it properly? But then again, (unless I know you) don’t touch me at the same time. There are no winners here!

Hugging – Now, This is something that I’m trying to do more of these days… But not to just any person it has to be someone that I actually like and trust. So the very few close friends that I do have, (and I mean my really close friends) I now try and greet them or as I’m saying goodbye, with a small hug. I remember the day where I decided that hugging was not for me – Well, I always knew I didn’t like the ‘feeling’ of a hug, but it was the day in march 2018 when hugging became a nightmare for me! It was the cold, wet, cloudy day of my sisters funeral. I will always remember feeling numb for the whole process, but I also knew that I had the most important job to do.. I had to ensure my sister funeral goes to plan. This flamboyant, fabulous, colourful young lady deserved a funeral fit for royalty! Anyway, it was the moment when I got out of the black limousine that followed my sisters ‘special limo’ – which carried my sisters heavily graffitied, pink and white coffin. That was the moment when I instantly hated hugging! I just remember getting out The limo, and straight away a ‘distant auntie’, who I see only at funerals or weddings… Takes it upon herself to launch herself at me, bringing me in for a massive hug! This wasn’t just a little like side-hug sorry for your loss thing, this was a I’m gonna squeeze the living daylights out of you. You are gonna FEEL how sad I am for you!! The thing that made it worse was that she was CRYING ON MY SHOULDER and I ended up comforting her!!! Honestly, I cannot explain how suffocated I felt in that moment. The hug was tight, she was baring her weight onto me, almost making me lose balance! The hug itself lasted what felt like 4 hours, I felt trapped and claustrophobic! Normally when I’m going through something I like to be left alone, I need space. And if I needed a hug, I’d bloody well ask for one!

So it was on that day I decided that when the time comes, and I have to do the same for my mum, I will be wearing a printed t-shirt, (or jumper, depending on what season she ‘passes’) with the words “Don’t f*cking touch me” in the largest font I can get!

T x